Thursday, April 27, 2006

Faedah Drama Cina

Saya rasa para pemimpin nak belajar mentadbir negara boleh lah menggunakan formula dalam drama kantonis TV3 6-7 petang atau RTM2 7-8 malam Isnin-Jumaat. (saya tak dibayar untuk promo ini). Contoh-contohnya:

1. Nak memajukan industri kecil dan sederhana - To Love With No Regrets tentang pembuatan kicap dan perusahaan makan (Dah lepas RTM2)

2. Menjaga kebajikan rakyat - Seeds of Hope tentang Jabatan Kebajikan Masyarakat, penglibatan syarikat korporat dalam menjalankan tanggungjawab sosial, tanggungjawab keluarga dan masyarakat (Dah lepas TV3)

3. Kecekapan polis - Armed Reaction tentang kecekapan polis, konspirasi dalaman, forensik dan kerjasama polis dan masyarakat (Dah lepas TV3)

4. Pentadbiran syarikat penerbangan (MAS boleh ambik iktibar) - Triumph in The Skies tentang Syarikat Penerbangan SOLAR Airways, kehidupan staf, latihan juruterbang, pramugara/ri, friendship, persaingan, amanah (Masih ditayangkan TV3)

Jadi, bila buka tv pukul 6 tu jenguk-jenguklah TV3. Best dosh!! Sampai family saya dah set dah, pukul 6 sure saya terpacak depan tv. Hanna my niece siap cakap, "Ni cerita Cu Adik!" Wah besar pengaruh saya. Hehehe... Bukan, saya bukan minat pada yang SEPET, juga bukan pelakon SEPET (Sharifah Amani vs Noor Amni). It's just a coincidence. Saya minat yang mata dia macam ni:

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Why lelaki kahwin lambat?

Malaysians are getting married at older age. Why? Let me give an example. It is a little bit long example. If you want to skip it, there is a summary at the end.

Say you are a fresh graduate at that age of 23, a male, starting a carrier as an executive officer working somewhere in KL with a salary, say RM2000 per month and without any saving in the bank. Monthly, extracting your expenditures on foods, transportation (public or motorcycle), electricity, water, phone, house rent and other expenses, say you can save about RM800 the most. Then, because you are a good son, you send some money to your parents or relatives about RM300 per month. This will give you a balance of RM500 of saving. For the first year, maybe you are very discipline with your budget, so you save about RM5000.

The next year at the age of 24, you meet a girl of your dream. Both of you plan to get married after one year or two. Ok, that's fine, it gives you time to save some more money and some more time to prepare the basic necessities for a 'happy' family? a car and a roof to live under. That year because you are a hard worker, you get a raise of 10%. Since you are also a gentleman, you make sure some money is put aside to spend on dates and gifts for your girl, so 10% goes for her. Like the previous year, after much sweat and meggie-eating months, you save another RM5000. Your company is doing ok. You are paid 2 months bonus. So, another RM4000 is added to your saving. So, your total saving now is RM14,000. You decide to spend about RM8000 on a brand-new RM40,000 car down payment. So, you net saving that year is RM6000.

The next year at the age of 25, you are doing fine at work. But because now you have to pay for car every month, your total monthly saving is cut down to about RM400. You save roughly about RM5000 that year. No bonus that year because your company is doing poor. So, your total saving in the bank is RM11,000. Then, you decide to get engaged with your girlfriend. She said OK. So, need to buy an engagement ring. RM1500 is spent on ring plus 'hantaran pertunangan'. So, your net saving that year is RM9,500.

The next year at the age of 26, you get promoted. Your salary now is 1.5 of your starting salary at the company. Good news!

You think. "Ok, this year I will get married".

So, you ask your fiancée "How much is the dowry (hantaran)?"

She say, "berapa-berapa yang u sanggup"

You ask,"RM5000 ok?"

She replies, "I okay je. Tapi my mom tu. Dia kata grad oversea macam I ni mane boleh letak rendah-rendah. Paling kurang RM10,000 tau!".

Your eyes 'terjegil', your tounge 'meleleh' and you faint on the spot.

"Where else in the world can I get extra money?", you say to yourself.

But, because you are very determined to get married with your dream girl and in the name of love, you work really really hard that year until you are awarded "The Best Employee of The Year". You get 3 months of bonus. You also do some side business to supply ayam pencen. So, roughly your net saving at the end of that year is RM20,000.

Ok, now you are 27 years old with enough saving in the bank to pay for the dowry. But then, come your mom saying,"Anak mak nak kawin ni mesti la buat grand grand. Kita sewa khemah besar-besar, jemput penyanyi ke artis ke sorang dua datang buat persembahan. Lauk pauk kita cater aje la ya? RM10 je sekepala. Baju kawin ko, kita sewa yg cantik-cantik dan mahal-mahal sket. Kita jemput dalam 1000 orang datang ok?"

You did a quick in-the-head-calculation, "1000 x RM10 = RM10,000, penyanyi lagi, khemah lagi, buta-buta je RM15,000!!! Tu tak masuk cincin kahwin lagi!!"

You say,"Mak, nak buat apa membazir-bazir duit ni?"

Your mom replies,"Apa pulak membazirnya? Kau kawin sekali je seumur hidup. Biarlah buat betul-betul."

You insist,"Tapi mak?"

Your mom says, "Dahlah, kau jangan nak buat malu mak. Cik Tipah jiran kita tu buat kenduri kat hotel siap Dato, Datin, Tan Sri Puan Sri lagi datang. Mana la mak nak letak muka kalau buat kenduri kecik kecik?".

Anyway, you finally get married. But, a beautiful happy life after marriage that you dream of with your wife does not last long. You have debts around your waist, interest gets higher every month, cannot afford to pay them, you wife gets tired of you asking money from her, she accuses you of being irresponsible husband for not being a good provider, blah blah blah? At the end, you two go into separate ways? You get divorced.

Problem breeds problem? Sometimes we wonder why marriage institution is failing in our country. The above example may not represent the whole phenomena in our culture, but perhaps it gives us some ideas of the problems young couple these days are facing in getting married from my perspective.

The Root Cause of The Problem
There is something wrong in our culture. I really think there are some practices in our culture in Malaysia (Malay culture specifically) that do not make sense and especially they are contrary to the teaching of Islam. These practices are well-rooted in our culture that unfortunately because of them, many people are 'afraid' to get married, or simply feel like they cannot afford when they are actually can afford. These are some of my observation and summary analysis:

1. Marriage should be done in the most modest way but in Malaysia, it is ought to be done in the most lavish way. Competition on whose wedding is the most grandeuris almost unavoidable. Fame is usually the reason why people spend unreasonable and wasteful amount of money for a wedding.

2. The "price" of a woman is measured according to her perhaps educational background, physical attributes and family social status not according to her knowledge and understanding of Deen and piety as suggested by the religion. The saddest thing is that "price" is put on women, who are supposed to be, if God-loving, kind-hearted and pious ones, "priceless"! 'Dowry' system is adopted by the Malays from perhaps the Indians who came to Malaysia long time ago. When the 'dowry' is put too high and men can't afford to pay, marriage is usually delayed or cancelled. An effort to build another small brick unit of this Deen is delayed or perhaps destroyed only for this reason.

3. Marriage should be a quick and easy process for the couple not hard, which eventually becomes a burden. These days, we make marriage so complicated that people are afraid of getting married. When I was in the US, I saw Muslim brothers and sisters getting married at the mosque, with just some sweets as the main course for the guests. The guests who were invited to witness the ceremony were usually whoever prayed jemaah at the mosque or some close relatives and friends. There is no point of being extravagance. We should focus on the life after wedding not the wedding itself.

Wedding is only a door to the marriage house. Why should we spent a lot of money to decorate the door so beautifully, when the inside of the house is then left empty, dark and unattractive?

And the pressure is on men


Monday, April 24, 2006

Jaci Velasquez — “Imagine Me Without You”

As long as stars shine down from heaven
And the rivers run into the sea
Til the end of time forever
You’re the only love I’ll need

In my life you’re all that matters
In my eyes the only truth I see
When my hopes and dreams have shattered
You’re the one that’s there for me

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you, I need you

Imagine me without you
I’d be lost and so confused
I wouldn’t last a day, I’d be afraid
Without you there to see me through

Imagine me without you
Lord, you know it’s just impossible
Because of you, it’s all brand new
My life is now worthwhile
I can’t imagine me without you

When you caught me I was falling
You’re love lifted me back on my feet
It was like you heard me calling
And you rush to set me free

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you, I need you


When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you, I need you oh


I can’t imagine me without you

Words and music by rudy perez

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Loving An Imperfect Person

They have been married for two years. He loves literature and often posts his work on the net, but nobody ever reads them. He is also into photography and he handles their wedding photos. He loves her very much. Likewise with her. She has a quick temper and always bullies him. He is a gentleman and always gives in to her.

Today, she’s being willful again.

Her: “Why can’t you be the photographer for my friend’s wedding? She promised she’d pay.”

Him: “I don’t have time that day.”

Her: “Humph!”

Him: “Huh?”

Her: “Don’t have time? Write less of those novels, and you will have all the time you need.”

Him: “I… someone will definitely recognize my work some day.”

Her: “Humph! I don’t care, you’ll have to do it for her!”

Him: “No.”

Her: “Just this once?”

Him: “No.”

Negotiation’s broken. So, she gave the final warning: “Give me a Yes within three days, or else…”

First day, she “withheld” the kitchen, bathroom, computer, refrigerator, television, hi-fi… Except the double bed, to show her “benevolence”.

Of course, she has to sleep on it too. He didn’t mind, as he still has some cash in his pockets.

Second day, she conducted a raid and removed everything from his pockets and warned, “Seek any external help, and you bear the consequences.”

He’s nervous now. That night, on the bed, he begs for mercy, hoping that she’ll end this state. She doesn’t give a damn. No way am I giving in, whatever he says. Until he agrees.

Third day, night. On the bed. He’s lying on the bed, looking to one side. She’s lying on the bed, looking to the other side.

Him: “We need to talk.”

Her: “Unless it’s about the wedding, forget it.”

Him: “It’s something very important.”

She remains silent.

Him: “Let’s get a divorce.”

She did not believe her ears.

Him: “I got to know a girl.”

She’s totally angry, and wanted to hit him. But she held it down, wanting to let him finish. But her eyes already felt wet. He took a photo out from his chest. Probably from his undershirt pocket, that’s the only place she didn’t go through yesterday. How careless.

Him: “She’s a nice girl.”

Her tears fell.

Him: “She has a good personality too.”

She’s heartbroken because he puts a photo of some other girl close to his heart.

Him: “She says that she’ll support me fully in my pursue for literature after we got married.”

She’s very jealous because she said the same thing in the past.

Him: “She loves me truly.”

She wishes to sit up and scream at him “Don’t I?”

Him: “So, I think she won’t force me to do something that I don’t want to do.”

She’s thinking, but the rage won’t subside.

Him: “Want to take a look at the photo I took for her?”

Her: “…!”

He brings the photo before her eyes. She’s in a total rage, hits his hand away and leaves a burning slap on his face.

He sighs. She cries.

He puts the photo back to his pocket. She pulls her hand back under the blanket.

He turns off the light, and sleeps. She turns on the light, and sits up. He’s asleep. She lost sleep. She regrets treating him the way she treated him.

She cried again, and thought about a lot of things. She wants to wake him up. She wants to have a intimate talk with him. She doesn’t want to push him anymore. She stares at his chest. She wants to see how the girl looks.

She slips the photo out. She wanted to cry and she wanted to laugh.

It’s a nicely taken photo. A photo he took for her. She bends down, and kissed him on his cheek.

He smiled. He was just pretending to be asleep.

“You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.”

hijrah pemikiran.. suatu yang dinantikan

Tahun-tahun lepas, dan yang pasti akan datang juga, rakyat malaysia terus dengan tema yang sama dan komen2 yang sama apabila ditanya 'apakah erti kemerdekaan' iaitu 'negara yang bebas dari penjajahan.'

Apa bila bermulanya tahun hijrah, itu itu juga yang timbul, hijrahnya Rasulullah dari Makkah ke Madinah. Sedangkan kita semua tahu apabila sesuatu perkara atau peristiwa itu berlaku, yang perlu kita nampak mulanya di permukaan ialah peristiwa itu sendiri secara zahiri, namun perlu kita selami ke dasarnya untuk memahami secara maknawi.

Apalah hikmahnya kemerdekaan dan peristiwa hijrah Junjungan kita? Menunjukkan kita mampu untuk berubah dan mampu menegakkan negara, mahupun pendapat kita, mengikut acuan kita sendiri. Mungkin mengikut acuan penjajah kita perlu terus menggunakan undang-undang mereka, tapi bila kita sudah merdeka, itu bermakna kita merdeka untuk menentukan undang-undang apa yang kita mahu gunakan, acuan bersegi yang bagaimana yang boleh kita guna untuk mencantikkan kuih demokrasi negara kita.

Hijrahnya Rasul telah menjadi satu anjakan pemikiran kita. Berhijrah dari menurut kata orang lain kepada menurut kata hati kita dengan petunjuk yang benar sepanjang zaman iaitu petunjuk dari ALLAH.

Inilah yang ingin saya jelaskan dalam posting saya kali ini iaitu perlunya hijrah pemikiran kita. Telah lama hijrah pemikiran ini kita sebut-sebutkan, tapi belum ada yang berani di dalam negara kita mahu merealisasikannya. Mungkin ada secara sedikit-sedikit, bukan secara total. Namun cukuplah itu sebagai penggerak ke arah matlamat yang kita tujui.

Melihat kesengsaraan rakyat melalui pelbagai program, yang ditayangkan di kaca televisyen mahupun yang ditayangkan di hadapan mata sendiri apabila pergi melawat kawasan-kawasan penempatan rakyat berpendapatan rendah, mencetuskan kesedaran di hati, sama ada tidak wujudkah hijrah mereka yang tinggal di situ atau pemimpin yang tidak hijrah pemikiran mereka untuk membantu rakyat tanpa mengharap pulangan undi yang ditaburi kes-kes rasuah?? Betapa pun kita sebagai rakyat biasa meluahkan melalui tulisan-tulisan di internet ini yang entah dibaca atau tidak oleh para pemimpin kita, atau melalui apa jua cara, adakah berlaku perubahan yang kita harapkan itu?

Sebelum mengharapkan berlaku perubahan itu di luar, perlulah kita ubah diri kita dahulu, kerana untuk membina sebuah negara Islam itu, kita perlu membinanya di dalam hati kita terlebih dahulu. Islamkan hati kita, niat kita, nafsu kita, tindak-tanduk kita. Kemudian Islamkan keluarga kita, kawan-kawan kita, saudara-mara dan kenalan-kenalan kita. Pengajaran yang diperolehi dari Multi Level Marketing, seorang cari dan ajak 3 orang masuk, kemudian 3 orang cari lagi 3 org, jumlah sudah 10 orang. Apabila dicari lagi, maka makin bertambah downline kita. Itu juga boleh dilakukan dalam proses Islamisasi ini. Islamkan hati dan kehidupan kita, Islamkan keluarga kita. Kemudian cari lagi kawan-kawan kita.

Dari kesungguhan itu Islam pasti berkembang. Insya ALLAH, kita sama-sama cuba pakai kaedah MLM** ini. Tak salahkan kita guna cara yang baik??

Sedikit catatan dari usrah di KISAS:
Ke arah mewujudkan negara Islam perlulah
1. Individu Muslim
2. Keluarga Muslim
3. Masyarakat Muslim
4. Jamaah Islamiyah
5. Negara Islam

Pinjam kata-kata Abg. Mirul dan Kak Elin dalam Omegatrend: JOM KITA BUAT SAMA-SAMA!

** kalau tak silap saya Datuk Seri Rafidah Aziz telah guna cara ini untuk menarik golongan wanita menyertai wanita UMNO.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Pergi Tak Kembali

Ni gambar tok dengan Hanna. Saya ingat lagi, tok begitu sayang dengan cicit2 nya. Saya pun naik jeles!!

Ni plak gambar tok tgh dukung ayman, masa tu sebelum tok sakit. Dalam bulan Mei 2005. Ayman pon kecik lagi, masih larat tok nak dukung.

Betullah kata orang, bila sesuatu itu telah pergi dari kita, baru kita terasa kepentingan dan rindu. Masa di depan mata, kita tak rasa. Rumah kami rasa sejuk dengan kehadiran tok, sebab zikir dan bacaan qurannya tak pernah putus. Abah suruh saya baca Surah Baqarah 3 kali, Yasin sekali dan surah apa tah satu lagi masa tok dah tak mampu bangun. Saya cuma baca Yasin dan Baqarah sekali ja, pahtu saya tertidur tepi tok. Bila saya jaga, tengok2 tangan tok tengah pegang tangan saya. Saya janji akan habiskan bacaan saya dan hadiah buatnya.

Kak cik pernah pesan kat saya, waktu tok masih ada ni kita nak berbakti, tak guna baru nak berbakti lepas dia tak ada lagi. Kakcik beruntung, dia ada di sisi tok pada saat2 terakhir tok. Saya cemburu!! =( Tak apalah, sekurang-kurangnya ada seorang di kalangan kami yang mampu uruskan tok dari mula hingga akhir. Terima kasih kak cik!!

Walaupun saya jauh dari tok, tapi saya gembira sebab banyak jugak ilmu masakan yang tok turunkan kat saya. Buat kuih cara, tepung bungkus, kuah kacang (yum yum!!), cucur masin, asam pedas, singgang, masak kurma dan macam2 lagi. Kira bertuah jugak saya ni ye? ;-) :wink:

Baiklah, life must go on, tapi nasihat dan panduan yang orang-orang tua beri tak boleh kita lupakan. Sama-sama kita teruskan perjalanan kita, sambil2 tu kita jgn lupa jengah2 masa silam yang boleh kita ambil iktibar.

p/s: kak cik, mana lagi best, murtabak megi ada daun bawang n cabai ka yang simple cam kat umah kak cik? invent lah lagi resepi guna megi, kita balik try sama2 nak? hehehehe!!!

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Kematian Itu Satu Perkara Yang Hak!!

Setelah seminggu lebih saya bercuti, hari ini saya mulakan dengan satu berita yang sangat2 menyedihkan saya sekeluarga. Nenek saya yang dikasihi, nenda Hajjah Fatimah bt Hj. Mohd. Nor pulang ke rahmatullah pada tanggal 29 Mac yang lepas pukul 1 petang. (alFatihah)

Setelah disahkan mengalami ketumbuhan dalam otak sejak Ogos 2005, nenda telah dimasukkan beberapa kali ke hospital Jitra. Kali terakhir ialah pada pagi hari pemergian beliau kerana menghidapi "severe pneumonia". Saya menerima khabar duka ini melalui panggilan telefon kak cik pada saat saya bergembira bersama sahabat2 dalam jamuan perpisahan pelajar Latihan Industri. Secara tiba2 wujud satu ruang kosong di dalam hati saya. Sahabat2 saya yang sangat memahami, Roslan, kak su, mirul, kak niza, kak g-ra, kak dang, en. nordin, cik noor, prof yazid, dan ramai lagi yang tak mampu saya tuliskan nama, terima kasih atas sokongan kalian dan bantuan yang kalian hulurkan.. Jazakallah khairan kathira..

Saya ditemani kak su, cuba cari tiket di depan hostel tok jembal, tapi dimaklumkan tiket habis. saya bergegas pulang ke rumah dan mintak tolong kak niza temankan saya ke bandar beli tiket. di pertengahan jalan, kak cik telefon dan maklumkan nenda akan dikebumikan pada petang itu juga, memandangkan keadaan nenda yang uzur di akhir hayatnya. saya pasrah kerana tak mampu menatap wajah nenda buat kali terakhir dalam perjalanannya menemui KEKASIHNYA. saya sedar, siapalah saya untuk menahan nenda, kerana 3 minggu sebelum itu, semasa saya pulang ke jitra, saya melihat tanda2 tidak sabar nenda mahu berjumpa KEKASIHNYA yang abadi itu.. saya sedar, siapalah saya.. =(

Kuasa ALLAH, tiket yang saya perolehi ialah tiket yang terakhir untuk malam itu. saya terus balik ke rumah sewa dan mengemas pakaian, solat Asar dan membaca Yasin sebagai hadiah terakhir buat nenda. Semakin menghampiri petang semakin saya rasakan saat perpisahan kerana nenda akan disemadikan selepas solat Asar. Saya tertidur selepas baca Yasin dan mimpikan senyuman nenda yang selama ini menemani saya. Hari yang paling lambat berlalu saya rasakan.

Selepas makan malam dan solat maghrib, saya dihantar oleh kak niza ke stesen bas tanjung. saya solat Isya di sana dan selepas itu dikejutkan dengan kehadiran dia untuk menemani saya. Dia ingatkan saya walaupun betapa saya mencintai nenda, cinta saya tak mungkin mengatasi cintaNYA kepada nenda, itu adalah suatu perkara HAK - kebenaran; yang pasti setiap insan akan laluinya. terima kasih, kalau awak tak temankan saya, kalau awak tak ingatkan saya, mungkin saya hanyut terus tak ingatkan qada' dan qadar yang pasti kita semua akan tempuhi.

saya sampai di jitra dijemput oleh kak cik dan kak teh. suasana di rumah walaupun cuba di ceriakan oleh semua orang, namun saya dapat kesan carik2 luka itu. manakan tidak, nenda (tok) lah yang selama ini membuatkan kami pulang, bersatu dan gembira. tok jugak yang menjaga saya selama saya di dalam wad akibat jaundice (demam kuning) masa baru dilahirkan. tok mengalirkan air mata, solat hajat agar darah saya tak ditukar dengan darah orang lain. tok yang mengajar saya buat kuih cara yang sedap tu. tok suka makan puding trifle dan kek choclate moist yang saya buat setiap kali hari raya. tok pernah menangis masa ajar saya mengaji Quran kerana saya nafas tak cukup nak baca panjang mad lazim. tok yang suka bila saya sapu losyen di tangan dan kakinya yang kering. tok saya.. tok saya yang suka pakai bedak wangi warna merah jambu, kemudian bila saya selalu mintak nak pakai, dia hadiahkan satu botol pulak untuk saya. tok yang masih ada gambarnya masa saya darjah empat panjat naik belakangnya untuk bermanja. tok yang mendengar sambil menitiskan air mata waktu saya menceritakan layanan buruk kak long dan mak teh terhadap saya masa saya di matrikulasi. tok yang buat kuah kacang yang sedap tiap kali raya, sampai george hirup macam sirap. tok yang pandai buat kuih-muih tradisional, tapi cucunya semua cuma pandai makan saja.

tok saya.. saya tak sempat berada di sisi tok sewaktu dia diambil pulang. saya tak mampu nak gembirakan tok. saya tak sempat pulang. saya tak mampu buat apa2 untuk tok. saya cuma ada upaya dengan izinNYA untuk hadiahkan tok, tok yah dan tok wan mad bacaan Yasin setiap malam. dan saya berharap, sesiapa yang membaca entri saya kali ini, sudi2 kan lah hadiahkan buat tok saya surah Fatihah dan Al-Ikhlas. itu saja yang mampu saya buat untuk tok. Moga tok, tok yah dan tok wan mad berada dekat denganNYA. Adik sayang tok!!

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